Tea, love and drunkenness

So - one of the main legendary factors of irishness is being a bit...well...pissed. So, if you do happen to find yourself at the wrong end of a few pints, do the following:

1) Get in a taxi, fake conversation (yes, it is terrible that there's too many drivers, of course the Primera is a fantastic car, and definitely those lampposts are too far apart)

2) get home, stinking of beer and smoke, and try to kiss your non-stinking girlfriend.

3) (and remember this is the step that will take you to a happy state of cheap bliss) Listen to some James Taylor, eat a bit of chocolate, a big durty mug of tea and snuggle up with someone you love. (or just fancy, like)